Long time no talk. Let's not get into that.
I turned 18 recently and while it's not that big of a deal (despite the fact that I now have hold of my own bank account, I can drink if I want to and I can drive as soon as I get my drivers license) I still reflected over it all. The reason why birthdays are such a big thing for me is because as a 14-15 year old girl, I didn't think I would let myself live another year. I've touched briefly on the fact that I suffered with depression and one day I'll go into that too. But today, or tonight, I want to list 18 things I've learnt these 18 years. Hopefully someone will learn something from this, and if not, then let's just hope you enjoy reading it.
- Follow your own road. Don't do something because everyone else is doing it, be original and don't be afraid to stand out. If I wouldn't have followed my own road I would still be deep in depression. So there's that.
- People say things they don't mean when they're angry, forgive them. This one has been tough. I don't think I'm fully there yet, but I'm learning and I'm trying. When I'm fully healed I'll be able to go into this more, but now I don't know how to go about it without putting people on blast.
- Everything is temporary. Pain is temporary, situations are temporary. All the bad stuff passes and you'll end up in a better place. And when you're in a better place happiness lasts longer and pain lasts shorter than before.
- Dreams are meant to be dreamed. You can be literally anything. Anything you set your mind to. You can strive to be the president or to heal the wounded or to save the poor. Take a big step towards your dreams. They're there to empower you.
- Sleep is important. I go to sleep before 9:30pm on schooldays. Enough said.
- Don't base your happiness on someone else's happiness. I think this is something most of us forget. Sure happiness is contagious, but what do you do when the person you base your happiness on is sad? It's a deep dark hole. Don't jump in there.
- Don't bottle up your feelings. Every time I've done that I've ended up having a mental breakdown. Find someone you can trust and talk to. Or just write a diary. Just don't keep it all inside.
- Some people will come and go. That doesn't mean that the time spent with them means any less, it's just means that they weren't there to stay. But some are there to stay.
- Love is wonderful. It's weird that I say that considering the fact that I've never had a real relationship nor have I ever had something successful with a guy. But love is truly wonderful. When loving someone else, whether it's a friend or a dog or a family member you learn something about yourself.
- Any kind of artform is a way of healing. Find your way to help you heal. I believe that art, such as music, writing, painting, helped me heal. It still helps me heal. There is music for everything, and writing and painting calms me down. Find some artform that calms you down and helps you heal. And practice that art.
- Be childish. This is something I embrace. I embrace the fact that I can run around my friends poking and teasing them. I embrace the fact that I sleep with a stuffed monkey named Huba Buba that I got when I was 5 or 6. I embrace the fact that I still have my imagination.
- Embrace nature. Take walks. Breathe in the fresh air. Look up at the sky. Understand that you're part of something amazing. And take care of it.
- Heartbreak is a part of life. Sadly it is, but it helps us grow. I don't mean that heartbreak isn't the worst thing that happens to us, but I mean that even though it is what it is, it teaches us something. I'm truly a believer in the fact that everything makes us stronger. So I'll accept the heartbreak, take a deep breath, and slowly continue moving.
- It's okay to not know what you want to do with your life. Nobody really knows what they're doing. I mean have you looked at all the adults these days? They're just winging it.
- There will always be idiots. I could use worse words to describe these people, but I've settled for idiots so that I won't dramatically hurt someone. Just a little hurt, nothing heart wrenching. On a serious note though, there will always be those people who don't know how to respect you or who will say stupid shit. let those idiots talk, it's the only way they're surviving.
- It is acceptable to cut toxic people out of your life. Out, poof, gone. No need to breathe in all the toxins from people who don't know how to treat you. You have all rights to get rid of them, because it's important that you take care of yourself and your health.
- Laughing is a coping mechanism. Laugh often and hard, because it heals you, it soothes your soul. And when you mess up, laugh even harder. Life is easier with a little laughter.
- You are so goddamn beautiful and worthy. This takes time to realise (about 18 years in fact) but I've come to the conclusion that I am beautiful and worthy. And I have a purpose. And I am here to conquer the world.
Wow that was a tough one. I hope you got something out of this, and if you didn't, here's a video I made a month or so ago: